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PAN expands on many things including his new album 'Hyperbolic Oxymoron' due for release on the 14th April 2022 on PsyWorld Records!
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Hemisphere: North Meets South in the Wild West

Reported by bunny / Submitted 07-02-03 10:55

Picture the scene: a lost and lonely HarderFasterer wanders forlornly along bleak and barren streets, seeking desperately the hitherto uncharted terrain (in Hard Dance circles at least) of the Shepherd’s Bush Empire. Eventually, frozen from the bitter cold and near-death from exhaustion, she decides to ask in yonder Oddbins the way to the hallowed ground. In the strange twilight that lay beyond the counter the shopkeeper did cry ‘ARE YOU LOCAL??’ Followed by the slightly more amiable ‘Ah, ‘tis close to spitting distance from here. Thou must follow the sound of excruciatingly awful pop music to its source. There thy shall find the Walkabout, and the Empire resides on its western flank.’ Thanking the eccentric wine merchant, the HarderFasterer embarks once more on her journey with hope in her heart and a miniature Bells in her pocket.

Ok, so that’s a slight exaggeration of the actual events but it did take me a while to get to Hemisphere. You see, it appears those lovely little dears operating the Central Line have been rather naughty of late and allegedly haven’t been doing their job as well as they should, resulting in the Central Line being out of action for a couple of weeks and all those who use it being stranded up a certain highly aromatic creek without a paddle. If it was all systems go on this branch of the Underground then the Empire would be incredibly easy to find, as it’s right on the green and only about 2 minutes walk from the station. As it is, bunny hatches up the brilliant plan of getting the Met line through to the other Shepherd’s Bush station and walking along from there, only bunny gets tried of waiting for a Metropolitan line train to show up so hatches up the even more brilliant plan of getting the Piccadilly line through to Hammersmith and walking down from there. And then becomes very late and very lost, as she has the same sense of direction as a sideboard.

So what I’m trying to say is that by the time I got there and checked all my stuff in I’d missed out on both Snake and Spencer Freeland’s sets, for which I’m very sorry to them both for not being able to include them in this review – an A-Z is definitely going to be a permanent fixture in my weekend bag from now on. As it is I make it into the cavernous main room of the Empire at 10.59 exactly, just as a riot of cheers and whistles marks Spencer’s exit from the stage – not entirely the best start to the night, especially since the reaction from a room absolutely crammed with clubbers is a very long way from subdued.



In the brief pause before the music kicks in again there’s a good opportunity to suss out the surroundings. The Shepherd’s Bush Empire, like the Brixton Academy and Camden Palace, has been converted from an old theatre in a club/gigging venue. In terms of it’s size it’s somewhere in between, with a similar layout to the Academy (a large stage at the front, a vast central dance floor and seated balconies round the back) but closer to the size of the Palace. There are three bars (all on the ground floor) around the back and sides of the dance floor and the main entrance is to the right of the room where the toilets are, meaning things can get pretty bottle-necked here when it’s busy. Upstairs there are 2 levels of balconies where you can sit down and chill but not smoke; it’s a listed building apparently so lighting-up’s a no-no, unless you can find an ashtray. Of course, this rule remains enforced for roughly 45 minutes, after which security realise there’s not a dog in hell’s chance of monitoring the several hundred people churning around up there and there aren’t enough ashtrays in existence with which to scoop up all their ash Wink The ceiling of the Empire is pitch black and so high it’s almost got its own cloud formations – the space between it and the dance floor seems to go on forever! Unfortunately this does seem to swallow up the sound to a certain degree, from my own impression and from the people I spoke to throughout the night a lot agreed that the treble could get rather lost and the bass at times was quite overpowering. Combined with relatively long queues for the cloakroom in the maze-like stairwells and a maximum, elbow-squashing capacity crowd, this meant that to begin with I wasn’t too impressed with the Empire, but considering the complete balls-up I’d made of getting here I decided that maybe I needed to chill out for a bit and give it a fair chance.



Standing by the back bar, it only takes a moment to cast your eye about the place, which is just as well because that’s all you’ve got before the music cuts back in. All foolish thoughts of relaxation are banished as the raw opening chords of Wild Child roar across the swarming masses and K90 launches into his first EVER 90 minute set Smile - and I do mean launch! That famous K90 energy is out in force tonight and it’s like a Godsend to those of us small and sneaky enough to nudge our way to the front. The wide, flat dance floor is totally packed-out, which is great for the atmosphere but not so good for dancing. Wherever you stand there’s hardly room for pogoing, let alone stomping and if either are attempted you end up flattening several people’s toes and getting your own pretty crushed into the bargain too Frown Eventually we give up on the main dance floor and find a spot at the left of the back bar that’s pretty clear – and get down to the business of boshing Smile Whinges on the venue aside, it’s a wicked set with all the hits you’d expect and want; I Get A Rush, Chemical Love, Breathe, All Your Base and the seminal track that everyone waits for, Red Snapper. They’re total classics that I for one certainly never get tired of hearing, because they’re anthems (dictionary definition: a song adopted by a group as an expression of identity – yep, sounds about right!), well made and without exception well-received whenever and wherever they’re played. As is the case tonight – there might not be much space to dance but that’s not going to stop anyone trying as the music soars through euphoric synths and strings before plummeting deep into rumbling beats and basslines. K90 makes the most of his 30 minutes extra time by scoring a few wonder goals with some less familiar tunes (the names are a mystery to me though, sorry!) that on several occasions went down just as well as the famous tracks Smile Then at 11.30 I heard one of the most popular phrases of the night for the first time: ‘That’s gotta be the shortest 90 minutes of my life’. Time flies people… Wink



Big regret of the night: there’s no Nick Sentience on the bill tonight. Unfortunately he’s had to stay out in Australia for longer than originally planned and so Steve Hill is extending his set to 2 hours to cover his slot in the line up. As with K90, Steve isn’t exactly renowned for being a shrinking violet Big grin so with an extra helping of his tunes on top of the 90 minutes of exhilaration we’ve already chomped up from Mark Doggett, it’s going to be one hell of a feast.

Watching Steve take to the decks always reminds me of watching a conductor take to the stand at the last night of the Proms. You just know you’re on the verge of an unforgettable performance Smile And you’re never wrong… Leading in with the sample from N-Trance’s Set You Free, we’re given a teasing little taster of Tiesto’s Silence before the full, hard mix of You’re Not Alone pounds across the place. Up on stage Steve’s warming himself up with a few sprints before the decks before ducking back for a quick mix and some perfectly executed eurhythmics… someone should tape one of his sets and release it as a fitness video, hehehe! Well, when the tune selection’s like this one you couldn’t fail to work up a sweat, as the speakers swell and shiver to Mr Bishi’s Toy Boy, DJ Meister’s Can U Feel It, Paul Maddox & DJ GRH’s New York, New York, Times Like These and the hard mix of Sunscream’s Love You More.

‘This is the best set of Steve Hill’s I’ve ever seen!’ – Tenacious-Dee




It certainly is a work of art mate, you’ve got that right! But these 2 hours of unadulterated bliss are overshadowed by a few minutes about a quarter of the way through of… well, the finest example of the ‘ooooh’ factor heard for a very long time. (Ooooh factor: when you here a tune so good it feels like ice fairies are tap-dancing up and down your spine, making you go ‘ooooh’). Normally the idea of anyone tinkering about with a Tony De Vit track would strike complete horror into any Hard Dance devotee’s heart but on this occasion the only things being struck, or more precisely plucked are my heart strings. The opening notes to The Dawn drift out across the dance floor and I get ready to dissolve into a little pool of stomped-out happiness. Then the vocals kick in and… hang on a minute, since when has The Dawn had vocals? Especially vocals as familiar as this… Enough of the teasing, what Steve indulged us with was a magical mashed-up mix of the TDV classic with the lyrics to Breather’s Come On sprinkled over the top. If you weren’t there to witness it then you seriously missed out – believe me, when everyone realised what was going on there was nearly a riot! Quite incredible the effect that just a few minutes of music can have on the human body, mind and soul… within a few short, colourful moments the dance floor is littered with breathless bodies leaning and sagging against one another like paper dolls.

Thankfully there’s actually space now in which to sag! You see, once the Walkabout next door had shut for the night a large portion of its drinkers relocated to the Empire, which was why it was so crowded earlier on (and also why a lot of people ended up with beer spilt down them). But at 2am the bar shut so by the end of Steve Hill’s set at 2.30 the place is starting to clear out a little bit as the beer boys & birds head home, leaving behind the hardcore clubbers and some much sought-after space to stomp in. Before I get accused of snobbishness, the majority of people at Hemisphere were no problem at all but there were perhaps 10-20% who were very obviously pissed out of their skulls, were having trouble getting their legs to work properly and were generally being a bit of a nuisance. They evidently weren’t there for the music so when the alcohol dried up they went, and left the rest of us to it.



By midway through Ed Real’s set the night is truly taking off as everyone finds (and makes the most of) their perfect place to dance. After the euphoria of K90 and Steve Hill – sets that lifted us so high we could play ten little piggies with God’s toes – it’s all change please and time for the dirtier side of Hard Dance to make an appearance. So brace yourselves for Bad Ass and Spacefrog’s Follow Me, and get those arms thumping and legs pumping Smile cause for the first half an hour the emphasis in the music is definitely on the Hard! We venture back out on the dance floor where it’s all-out war on the woodwork as the enduring Hard House nutters do the Spotted Dog, Sundissential Shuffle and every other move going with extra special turbo force. In the second half Ed cleans up his set with a return to the lighter side of boshing, with the excellent Exit EEE’s Epidemic and his sign-off tune, Miss Behavin’s Such A Good Feeling and one glance around the room tells you all you need to know: the night is now fully flying!

It’s 3.30 now and I’ve bagged the best place in the house, centre-front before the stage, space to dance in and plenty of people around to dance with! Besides being a great spot for stomping it lets you feel full force of the energy from the DJ, an opportunity that’s far from wasted when it’s Rob Tissera on the decks. Leading in with a short sample from the sublime Layo + Bushwacka’s Love Story that cascades straight into Miss Shiva’s Dreams, you’re left with the distinct impression that there’s an above-average chance this set will be really rather good Big grin Let’s look at the evidence… The Beginning, We Come One, Heaven’s Gate’s I Don’t Need This, Bulgarian, THAT Firestarter mix, and a teaser from Born Slippy were the ones I managed to stop bouncing long enough to make a note of. So, you know, it was alright I suppose, if you’re into that kind of thing Razz

Of course it was more than just alright, it was pretty much a superlative set Smile Oodles of energy, caboodles of enthusiasm and lashings of exhilaration all mixed together to perfection and topped off with Rob’s infectious high spirits. Whether you were havin’ it right down the front or back the irresistible momentum in the music left you with no choice but to GO MENTAL!!! But then, what on earth else would you want to do when you’re listening to good tunes, courtesy of a great DJ and with your best friends?



5am indicates the last set of the night but it’s also a first; that’s to say, it’s the first time Tara Reynolds has been given the honour of closing a night for Frantic. From opening sets in the upstairs bar at Camden Palace to the final set in the main room at a brand new night… major congratulations are in order for such an achievement! This lady’s come a long way in a relatively short space of time. But let’s get down to the fundamentals, because the deciding issue has to be this: what was the set itself like? Pure Tara, but on a far bigger and bolder scale than before. Playing the last set at any event is an awesome task, quite literally, but to close the first night of a new event has to be twice as challenging. The last hour is the time of the night when everyone is longing to totally let go, cut free, go wild and loose it once and for all. It’s basically the climax to your weekend and more likely than not the most enduring memory of your night that you’ll take home with you. So you really want it to be unforgettable… and this is what I remembered…

From the beginning the style of the set is laid out loud and clear: happy, hard and very hectic. An early spin of the old mashed-up mix of Insomnia, No Sleep, gets me going deliriously doolally because it was one of the first big tunes I ever danced to in a Hard House club – talk about stomping off on the right foot! Even at the very back of the bar (no drinks = no punters waiting = LOTS of space to throw yourself about in Smile) people were leaping around like apoplectic grasshoppers (or bunnies) so God only knows what carnage was taking place in middle of the dance floor. Banging through our brains and bodies was what was inspiring and encouraging this annihilation of the peace; 99.9, Soultaker, Tension, Razor’s Edge and the ever-excellent Motherfucker by Paul Glazby (close 2nd to the The Dawn/Come On mix for tune of the night for me) – all helped to seal the deal on my soul. Yep, sold it to the Hard Dance Devil in exchange for the ability to bosh all night… think that was a fair arrangement, don’t you? Wink



So by the time the first Hemisphere is over my mood has done a 180-degree turn and I’m feeling pretty embarrassed by how I felt earlier. Although I’m still not entirely sold on the Empire as a venue I’ve warmed to it a great deal over the night and I’m willing to give it another go. The main space before the stage may be a bit of a nightmare when the place is packed but if you head away to the back of the room and up to the balconies there are lots of places you can go where you can quite easily dance without getting in anyone’s way, and the seats up there are incredibly comfortable for those who want to chill. The sound could do with a little working on but altogether the Shepherd’s Bush Empire really feels quite cosy and it is in a good location (honest!). The music policy was spot-on all night, making the launch of Hemisphere a real success and marking it out as a night to look out for. The idea of showcasing northern and southern DJs and encouraging them to demonstrate their individual techniques resulted (and looks set to continue to do so) in a night of unconventional sets and styles. It has to say something that by the time Tara Reynold’s last track played out I was wondering why I’d ever felt anything less than 100% energised earlier on…

So thanks to Frantic for providing us with a complete change, and for having the bottle to experiment with something new and original. Thanks as well to the DJs for getting us all going with some mind-blowing tunes, to all the Harderfasters and every other clubber there who helped bounce the night away and to the Empire’s first-aid team who patched up that crazy who supposedly though he was the Hard Dance answer to Tarzan (a few seconds and 15-odd vertical feet later he was proved to be very wrong). Thankfully he only had a bump on the head and walked away pretty unscathed. Hemisphere certainly was a night to remember – who knows what the next one will bring? Guess there’s only one way to know for sure… Wink


With thanks to littlemissgenki and mrbicgit for the use of his photos


The next Frantic event is Chemistry No.5 at the Camden Palace this weekend, Saturday 8th Feb - for full details click here.




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Other Features By bunny:
It's about music - interview with Alex Parsons
Monkey business as usual: interview with Shaf De Bass
Twistathon – Twist’s 12 Hour 1st Birthday Bonanza
Zoology's 2nd Birthday - Review!
becomeone: Unified in Sound - Review
The views and opinions expressed in this review are strictly those of the author only for which HarderFaster will not be held responsible or liable.
Comments:

From: Huggies on 7th Feb 2003 12:27.06
Properley gutted i wasn't there, but after this part of me feels that i was!!!!
Steve Hill - Olive You're not Alone......ABSOLUTLEY LEGEND.....would die for that tune, no really i would.

From: littlemissgenki on 7th Feb 2003 13:27.20
another superb review bunny, you really have a way with words! sorry I missed you in there--I pretty much stayed in the same place all night down the back, rather than try and deal with the crowd...

From: UFS… on 12th Feb 2003 18:38.30
jus 1 small matta of concern: a few seconds + a few feet, perhaps... but a few thousand light yrs moreso... that man has gone where no otha has; othawise anotha sharp rview!!!

From: AbFab on 14th Feb 2003 02:40.55
yes and exactly where ARE sideboards going anyway...?? Seems like only yesterday after readin this, and ABSOLUTELY bloody fanTASTIC photos guys!

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